I've been stopping myself from doing the things I love


Today, let's mark this date. I've realised what's been holding me back from releasing my creativity to the world.

1. I know what I want to do but I don't know where to begin.

2. I'm afraid that the way I do it, won't be the best way.

3. If I create something, I feel embarrassed to show it. I'll only reveal it if there's a gun pointing to my skull.

Funny thing about the last statement is that I was too afraid to admit that. I'm the first person to announce my opinion and not give two birdy poops about it. In regards to my creativity, or something I've been working on quite hard - I'm reluctant to show anyone. I don't care if someone likes what I'm doing, because there's a number of things that I know I don't like. I genuinely feel embarrassed to show someone my hard work or what I truly love. Like they will see a different side to me.

It's ironic (well I'm not sure if it really is ironic, still at 21 I'm struggling with irony) but if someone tells me that they feel lazy to create something, I'd push them out of that slum! Finding so many ways to motivate them: sending inspiring YouTube vids, handing over mindful books, and telling them that they are great at what they do.
 If someone tells me they think that their work isn't good enough, and they're fearful to do anything because others are better; I'd say "yeah, it's probably been done before, and it probably will be done again - but you haven't done it yet. How do you know that you won't be the best?"
 I've got a great example of this below*

So why am I not taking on my own advice?

Do I need someone else to tell me this? No, don't think I do. I know it, so I don't need someone else to tell me.

I need to read over Elizabeth Gilbert's Big Magic, if you want a glance of what the book entails watch:

Elizabeth Gilbert & Marie Forleo on Fear, Authenticity and Big Magic

Sometimes  A lot of the times I need a push. 

And this post right here will push me, get me outta that funk, reveal what my fears are so now there's nothing to hide. Now I can get on with what I want to do.

My question of the month:

Who are you living your life for?

Stop worrying about what others will think of your work, they may love it or hate it. Why does that matter to you? It's much more important that YOU love it and it's what YOU will keep on doing.

*I gave my friend an example of this. How many rom-coms have you seen where: boy meets girl, girl meets boy. Boy hates girl. Girl hates boy. Something strange or catastrophic happens. Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy.

I'm coming up with a list of rom-com films. Some (I'm guilty to say) I love and others I despise. Hollywood keep on making these and won't stop. Why? Because there's a writer out there who hasn't written there own version of it yet.

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